can i love

Jesus.

If I was to write you a love letter, what would it look like? Would there be lots of blotches on the page where I couldn’t find the words to say or places where the lines were scratched out a thousand times? Would there be tears on the pages? Would the words be long and lingering or short and succinct? Would I tell you I couldn’t live without you? Would I tell you that my one desire is to live and breathe in you, or would I pretend otherwise?

CAN I LOVE YOU? Are we capable of such consistency in a world that is always changing? I don’t want to change. Instead, I want to grow in you, to know you more. I want to believe you more because I know you more. I want to trust you because of who I know you to be. I want to trust that the gifts I have to give are already yours. Would you work on my heart? Would you break me of my pride and stubborn fear? Would your holy spirit wash over me I pray that I would submit every aspect of life to you. Every desire Every fear Every tear cried ever Every heartache Every injustice Every burden Every person Every love Every gift Every goodness Every song Every joy Every pain Every hope Every dream Every project Every professor Every friend Every roommate Every Christian Every step. Lord of life would you define the boundaries of my mind and heart and the limits of my mind so that I would submit each and every thing held tightly to you?

Let my hands release and heart unfold and mind unwind so you can have your work in me…..that your peace would fill my heart. I want the peace that passes understanding and guards our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. I trust that you know me Lord and love me beyond what I can comprehend…….renew in me the faith of my first love with you.

undone

Today I realized something

If i stop
breathing
walking
moving
talking
spinning
dancing
running
hopping
and doing kartwheels

the World will keep on going
the Planets will stay in alignment
the Stars will be just as bright
the Sun will rise and fall
and people will maintain "order"

If I decide to take a day off
its possible

no one will notice
its possible
no one will miss
the running spinning and hopping
of my general existence

its possible that the world will be a better place

with or without me
but not
with or without God

if
i saw all
the miracles in a day
would i recognize that it was Him?
would i give the glory to Him?
would i stop thinking of myself?
would i leave the equation
and become
undone

they run on

The hills and curves of farmland melt into the landscape. A carpet of green meets trees and gullies and brown fields which run to meet my eye. There is no end in sight, for the trees run on and on into the horizon, claiming the farthest mountains. Red farmhouses dot the landscape through the leafless birches and wooded fortress. The barns do not seem out of place because someone must tend these fields of green. Otherwise, they would not bear fruit and instead return to the wilderness from which they came. What is out of place is the gravel road before me whose grey tones do not meet the fields of brown and green. Their color cuts off the landscape and now I am looking into a frame instead of reality. The blue sky and rugged countryside are too vivid to exist in such a context. And yet, the fields do exist here. Farmers sow wheat and barley and rye in the late spring and hope for the rain and sun with all their might. They wait for the rain like each of us waits for the love of our lives. Roads meet their dreams and they do not end there but continue to run on. They run into towns and cities and lands far beyond this farm, this land and this place. They run into you and me so that we might someday stop to see the hills and curves.